You must live in Vermont if…

In an effort to lighten that increasingly oppressive feeling that accompanies the inevitable Winter that’s literally right around the corner for these parts, I give you Jeff Foxworthy’s classic opinion of this wonderful state of Vermont:

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Forget Rednecks … here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Vermonters…

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don’t work there, you live in Vermont.

If you’ve worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in Vermont.

If you’ve had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you live in Vermont.

If “Vacation” means going anywhere south of Burlington for the weekend, you live in Vermont.

If you measure distance in hours, you live in Vermont.

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live in Vermont.

If you have switched from “heat” to “A/C” in the same day and back again, you live in Vermont.

If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Vermont.

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you live in Vermont.

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you live in Vermont.

If you design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you live in Vermont.

If the speed limit on the highway is 65 mph, you’re going 80, and everybody is passing you, you live in Vermont.

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you live in Vermont.

If you know all four seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, you live in Vermont.

If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you live in Vermont.

If you find 10 degrees “a little chilly,” you live in Vermont.

And one from myself…

If your idea of a good time on a Friday night is watching cars get stuck in the snow trying to make it up the road, you live in Vermont.

2 thoughts on “You must live in Vermont if…

    • Grandad – In a word? Yes. Never mind the longer explanation as I try not to swear in the comment section. This is my own policy and only applies to myself you see. I need this sort of policy…especially when talking about the cold…and the snow…and the shoveling…and…

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